darthvaderfanboy | Inbox for Hadriel

[Every night since their break up had been cold and lonely. Their room became his room again but he still found himself hugging Kylo's pillow every night. He hated feeling so weak and emotional but it still hurt.

He lay awake in bed thinking about what Maketh had told him, that this was supposedly normal for couples. He had never seen a normal relationship- growing up in the middle of the Imperial military in the Unknown Regions had deprived him of that. He hated to admit it but she may be right- he had to apologize and try to mend things.

He wasn't going to be able to sleep, it was 3 am but he was wide awake. He had two peaches by the side of his bed- Anakin had a talent for finding fresh fruit. It wasn't much of a peace offering but it was what he had as he headed out of his room and to Kylo's room.

He paused at the door, lifting his hand but didn't knock right away. He was taking a risk by approaching Kylo, there was a chance that things were broken too far beyond repair and he would get the door slammed in his face. But he had to try or else he would never know for certain so with a deep breath he knocked on the door.]

[Sharing space with Hux without actually being with him had been pure torture for Kylo Ren. They pretty much avoided each other throughout the day, which hurt, but was bearable. But the nights were the worst, Kylo's long frame curled up in bed, longing for the feeling of Hux in his arms again, a pair of ice-cold feet being warmed up on his.

He wanted to say sorry, but he didn't even know where to start with it. Hux had clearly wanted things to end, so how could he go back and tell him that he'd made a huge mistake? No, it was better this way, to be sad and alone then go groveling back to someone who didn't care for him anymore.

He was in his room, idly wondering what Hux would think about the mess he'd made with his dirty clothes when he heard a knock at the door. At this time, there was only one person it could be. Kylo focused on the door and it opened of its own volition. His face remained impenetrable when he saw Hux standing there, though his heart began to beat out of his chest. He kept his voice level as he asked.]

What do you want?

[For a moment he stood there, debating if he should flee back to his room and deny that he had knocked on Kylo's door. Each second felt like an hour until Kylo opened the door. He wasn't sure what to expect as he looked at Kylo's expression.

At least the door wasn't slammed at his face.]

I have peaches. And I figured we should talk, we can't avoid each other in the house forever.

[Once he spoke the words aloud he regretted it for how desperate it sounded.]

At least take the peaches before you slam the door in my face. [He held out the fruit, deciding that he would give Kylo that option if he wanted.]

[Kylo raised a hand and dragged Hux forward using the Force. Not strictly necessary, but he was still sore about the way things had ended between them, and wanted to prove a point. When Hux was at the end of the bed, Kylo sat up, and took a peach.

He didn't bite into it, instead just staring at Hux with those incredibly dark eyes, waiting for him to speak. He wasn't going to be the one to start talking. Hux had started this and he could very well continue it.]

You could have just invited me in. [He didn't like being dragged around by the Force but he didn't stop Kylo from taking one of the peaches.

He didn't look away, meeting Kylo's gaze directly.]

I'm not sure how we're supposed to do this. Neither of us like how things are right now.

[He had no idea how to approach this, especially since Kylo wasn't helping.]

[Kylo bit into the peach as he listened to Hux talk. At his core, Kylo Ren was still mentally very much little more than a teenager who liked to act out. He was hurt and upset with Hux, which made him very much want to act like the spoiled brat he'd become under Snoke. But he couldn't do that if he wanted a chance to mend things with Hux.]

You're the one that wanted to end things. [Yes, Kylo would childishly be insisting that this was all Hux's fault.] Have you changed your mind?

[He tried not to sound too hopeful as he asked.]

I didn't want this.

[Hux took a deep breath, this was difficult for him but he had to at least but he wasn't going to let Kylo just sit there without apologizing for what he did.]

You used every vulnerability I handed to you against me without remorse.

[He paused for a long moment, clutching his fists slightly. He could count the numbers of times that he had apologized and actually meant it on one hand. He didn't feel true remorse often, this was an emotion that he wasn't used to.]

I know I shouldn't have done that to you and I apologize.

[This time he had to look away, looking down at the foot of the bed and the second peach which sat there. He didn't want to look at Kylo and see rejection there or worse, nothing. He hated that he hurt, he hated the cowardliness which kept his gaze on the peach.]

If you have nothing more to add, I'll leave you to let you sleep

[Kylo Ren listened as Hux talked. Really listened as he was never warranted to do. He wanted to fix this just as badly as Hux did. The only example he had in his life of a somewhat stable relationship was his parents. No matter how much they fought, they always made up afterwards. At least he knew what to do now.

He reached across to where Hux was looking down and gently placed one of his hands over Hux's pale ones. He ran his thumb over the edge of his palm.]

I'm...sorry too. [The words came awkwardly but sincere.] I shouldn't have yelled at you. And I shouldn't have tried to kill you. Again.

[Hux finally looked up when Kylo put a hand over his. It took him a moment to process Kylo's words, he could never remember a time when Kylo would have apologized to him before. Normally their fights turned into more fighting and destruction.

But this...this was much better.]

Apology accepted.

[He didn't want to hold onto this, especially since Kylo seemed sincere in his apology. He moved to sit on the edge of the bed slowly, not pulling his hand away from Kylo's. He wasn't sure where to go from here though but he didn't want to leave.]

It's been cold at night.

[He looked relieved that the apology had gone over as well as it had. He had been expecting a lot more resistance or for things to be so bad that they couldn't be fixed. This was a lot easier than he ever would have thought. But then he'd never been in a proper relationship before.]

Stay here tonight. [He didn't want to get up and have to go all the way back to Hux's room when there was already a perfectly good bed right here for them to use. As incentive, he leaned over and kissed Hux lightly on the lips, tasting a little of peach juice.]

[He wasn't sure if this meant that they were back together for certain but when Kylo kissed him he decided that they could discuss that later. He leaned into the kiss, running his tongue along Kylo's lips to get the last of that peach taste.]

Move over. [The bed was a bit narrower than the one in his room but it would do. He had a feeling it wouldn't be an issue as he crawled under the blankets. His feel instantly found Kylo's before he leaned over to kiss him once more. The distance between them had been more difficult than he had expected it to be even though it had only been a handful of days.]

[As Hux lay back down, everything seems click right back into place. This just feels right, the way he's got his arms wrapped around his lover, their feet intertwined, his hand lightly stroking through Hux's hair.

Of course, the moment does take a turn for the odd when the green cat with the tentacle face, horns, and wings hops on the bed, lying on top of Hux's legs, and promptly falling asleep, its little tentacles wriggling back and forth slowly. That's just another thing he's got to be thankful for, Hux's tolerance of Kylo's cat hoarding.]

[There were no more doubts as he laid his head on Kylo's shoulder, smiling at the feeling of Kylo stroking his hair. He did look up when he felt a cat settle on his legs. Despite its unusual appearance it still acted like a cat and Hux had warmed up to the creatures despite his grumbling on the subject.]

Does this one have a name? [he looked back at Kylo, resting a hand on his chest. He didn't move otherwise, not wanting to disturb the cat.]

[Kylo looks up to see which cat it is. He's not too happy that Hux gave away the many-mouthed one, but since he gave it to Maketh, he hadn't grumbled too much on the subject. He continues to stroke Hux's hair as he answered him.]

I was thinking of naming it Executor.

[He sounds just a trifle embarrassed about his Vader fanboyism, especially since they're living with the man and all, but come on. It's a good name, and already fits the theme naming they have going on with Eclipse, who has already been unhappy with these new interlopers in his territory.]

[Hux looked over at Kylo, a little surprised but chuckled softly. He knew of Kylo's admiration for Vader but he was still amused that he was willing to go along with the star destroyer naming theme he had started with Eclipse.]

Executor it is then. It fits.

[He wouldn't tease Kylo about his Vader admiration tonight but instead leaned up to give him a kiss.]

[Kylo's eyes begin to shut with the feeling Hux lying close next to him. This is all he wants here and right now, a far cry from the Knight who had showed up months ago only wanting power.]

Good. Maybe now I can finally get some sleep.

[Had he just admitted he'd been having just as much trouble sleeping as Hux had? Oops. Ah well. Hux had seen him at his most vulnerable and had still stuck around. Frankly, if they ever broke up for real, Kylo was going to need to kill him, for the man knew far too many of his secrets and weaknesses already.]

[Hux shifted so he could rest his head tucked up against Kylo's. No one else had seen him like this, exposed, or even willing to express the least bit of affection. But tonight he reached out with one hand for Kylo's, lacing their fingers together. He was still learning how to express how he felt but every day it was getting easier.

He let out a breath at Kylo's admission, apparently he wasn't the only one who slept easier like this.]

Good night, Kylo.

[He yawned quietly before closing his eyes, listening to the sound of Kylo's heart, his breathing as he drifted off.]

Inbox for Hadriel

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